high.

22 Mar

i always wondered what it felt like to be an addict. Never wanted to really experience it, but i always wondered…how could you want something so bad? How can you let something control and consume you…a drug that you know is no good for you? Then i slipped and tripped into your arms and next thing i know i fell in love. i was high. for the first time in my life i was really high. hit after hit i couldn’t get enough. didn’t know if it was your love drug or if i got bit by the love bug…but either way i had to have it. Cloud 9 was an understatement, i was touching the heavens. i was soaring the clear blue skies like the bird i always wanted to be. i thought i was free. one day you came to me, and told me that you had to leave. you said it was getting to real and you couldn’t allow yourself to feel. my love, my dealer, my drug….but…

i was numb. i was hopeless. i’d give anything to be high. i’d give anything to soar those skies. just one last hit baby and i swear i’ll be alright…

the thought of it consumed me. the time spent ruined me. 

i know what it’s like to be an addict. i know what it’s like to be high and not have it. my dealer…my drug…my only first love.

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